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Of what importance the “Conscience does accompany the remittance it is usually Fund” is will be appreciated when it is penned in back-hand, printed or typewritexplained that in less than a century Uncle ten, and unsigned. Sam has received from voluntary contribu- Most of the contributions for the Contors more than one-third of a million dollars. science Fund” are transmitted by mail, but Prior to 1811 all “conscience” money re- sometimes a remittance is received by exceived was turned into the general revenues press, and on a few occasions money has without any account being kept of remit- been taken to the treasury department at tances, but in that year the receipts were Washington by special messengers who so heavy that it was decided to create a would give no information as to its source. special fund for the donations, and this was When a remittance is made by a penitent done. Of course, the “Conscience Fund” himself it almost invariably comes in the is an imaginary institution in that all the form of currency; but in a few instances money received eventually finds its way to coin has been sent. A Chicago man who the accumulation of public money from

considered that he owed the government which Uncle Sam pays his bills, but a sepa- $1,665 adopted the novel scheme of cutrate record is kept of the monetary testi- ting in two a bunch of bills, sending onemonials to the honesty of the American half of each piece of currency to the treaspeople.

ury at Washington and the other to the The contributions to the “Conscience sub-treasury at New York. As the mutiFund” have ranged all the way from two lated currency would be valueless until recents to $14,225.15.

As a rule the very united by Uncle Sam, he thus made sure small contributions come from persons who

that his remittance reached the proper have in one way or another evaded the pay- hands, ment of postage, while the large sums re- The Conscience Fund” contributions ceived are in most instances to reimburse reach Uncle Sam through a variety of differthe government for tariff duties which have ent channels. Most of them are sent direct been evaded. The latter, however, has to the treasury department, or else addressshown a falling off in recent years.

The ed simply to “Conscience Fund, Washingreturning American traveler is now sub- ton, D. C.”; but quite a few remittances jected to so many petty and needless an- of this kind are sent to the president at the noyances by the customs officials at seaports White House; restitution for evasions of the that the average citizen has his inherent postal regulations is frequently made to the Puritanical ideas of honesty somewhat post-office department; and pension frauds dulled by his indignation.

which form a large share of the misdeeds Contributors to the Conscience Fund” for which conscience-stricken mortals make almost without exception conceal their iden- amends to the government, are ofttimes set tity. Some of them take the most extrav- right by money deposited with the commisagant precautions lest they be known. sioner of pensions. Frequently contributions are made through The treasurer of the United States enclergymen. There have been a number of deavors to acknowledge the receipt of every instances in which jailers have performed conscience contribution; but in most insuch service for remorseful criminals and stances the contributors have taken such occasionally a relative or friend acts as in- care to conceal their identity that no means termediary, while the largest single contri- can be found to apprise them of the safe bution ever made to the “Conscience Fund” arrival of their remittance. On the other was forwarded to the secretary of state by hand, some of the persons who square a United States consul abroad.

accounts with Uncle Sam are extremely After all, however, the majority of con- anxious to know that the money has reached science-stricken individuals send the money the right hands, and ask that a receipt be themselves, but almost always with every sent to a third party or acknowledgment possible safeguard against the discovery of made in some specified newspaper. the sender. Usually the postmark on the A large proportion of the persons who envelope is the only clew to even the where- have sent money to the “Conscience Fund” abouts of the contributor.

Many times have been prompted to take such action by the sole contents of an envelope directed conversion to religious belief. A letter reto the Conscience Fund” are a number ceived a short time ago from West Virginia of pieces of currency, and when a letter read: “I have settled with the Lorde. I




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am due the government too dollars, which are quite a number of more or less ludicrous find inclosed herewith. You need not send atonements. One man wrote: “While I receipt, as the Lorde has already receipted. was employed as a letter carrier in a town Yours in the Lorde." Occasionally money

which I don't mention here I stoled ten is sent with no word of explanation, and dollars from a letter. I got religion since, without being specifically addressed to the thank the Lord ! and that ten dollars has

'Conscience Fund”. In such cases the been bothering me considerable. Nobody supposition is that it is intended for the ever knew I took it, and there ain't no fund, which is the only one of its kind under chance of me ever getting arrested for it, so the government, and probably in the world, I send hereby five dollars, which you will and it is duly deposited to the credit of this please put in the 'Conscience Fund,' for 1 peculiar institution. Not all the contrite want to do what's rite and propper. citizens discharge their responsibilities with Another man informed the treasurer of the coin of the realm. For instance, there was United States that he had experienced the former government employe who sent many twinges of conscience because of back a rug he had stolen, but not, it may owing the government $65. He had finally be added, until he had enjoyed the use of decided to ease his conscience by sending the article for five years and it had become the $10 which he enclosed, and he added sadly dilapidated.

that if this did not give him complete relief Not long ago a man wrote to the treas- from the twinges he might send another ury department and inquired whether if he $10 at a later date. made a confession in his own name the All communications relative to the “Concommunication would be regarded as confi- science Fund” are turned over to the dential. He was informed that there could secretary of the treasury, or rather to his be no guaranty of secrecy, since all letters to private secretary, and are duly filed, forthe department were placed in the public ming a collection of epistles which is records, and it was suggested that he make probably unrivaled anywhere in the world, his confession through a clergyman. Some- unless it be by the accumulation of letters times there is quite a little correspondence to Santa Claus at the dead-letter office. between the department and a person acting The remittances of course, ultimately find on behalf of an individual who wishes to their way to the office of the treasurer of the reimburse Uncle Sam through the “Con- United States, who, as has been noted, enscience Fund.”

deavors to make due acknowledgment of Mingled with the truly pathetic cases each contribution received.




They're fixin' up the platform for the battle that's on hand,
They're loadin' them with language we ain't s'posed to understand;
They're puttin' big words in 'em, so's to make 'em look immense,
They tell about whereases and the wherefore and the whence,
And there's lots of foolish people think they're splendid things, no doubt,
Havin' not the slightest notion as to what they're all about.

Why does each side have a platform? For to catch the votes, that's all,
And we'll hear a lot concernin' what they mean 'twixt now and fall;
They'll be sendin' glib-tongued fellers here and there and all around
For the purpose of explainin' that they're good and safe and sound,
And they'll put a meanin' in them that ain't there nor meant to be,
The whole thing's a game of bunko that's as plain as A, B, C.

The Republicans'll tell us that their platform's fair and strong,
And that every plank that's fashioned by the Democrats is wrong,
And the Democrats'll come and try to make us understand
That they've got the only platform that was ever justly planned;
They'll discover hidden meanin's where our trust's to be betrayed
In the "cunnin', wicked" platform the Republicans have made.


What's the good of these here platforms that go windin' in and out
And are made so common people don't know what they’ all about?
What's the use of usin' language that means nothin' when you're through?
They could make it plain and simple if they only wanted to.
Here's a platform I will write you that, if things were on the square,
Would be all your party needed: “We'll be honest, we'll be fair”.

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T is an interesting fact that nearly

one-tenth of the entire population of the United States lives within a

distance of 226 miles, in almost a straight line, in the cities and towns located on the route of the famous Royal Blue Line, between Washington, Baltimore, Philadelphia and New York.

Besides the metropolitan quartette of cities named above, are the thriving cities of Wilmington, Del., Chester, Pa., Plainfield, Trenton, Elizabeth, Newark and Jersey City, N. J.; while between them lie the thickly-populated suburban villages.

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way. As the business grew it became necessary to run hourly trains between Washington and Baltimore and between Philadelphia and New York.

Within recent years this splendid service was greatly augmented by trains leaving the terminal stations on the stroke of the clock. For instance, all through trains from Washington to New York, leave Washington "every other hour on the odd hour," and the through trains from New York to Washington, leave New York every other hour on the even hour." Between Washington and Baltimore, trains leave both cities "every hour on the hour” throughout the day, and the same service exists between Philadelphia and New York. The value of this arrangement to the traveling public is apparent; it is not necessary to carry a time table.

To this excellent arrangement of schedules, is added, a most superior train service; Pullman cars, either parlor or sleeping are on all trains; the coaches are of the very newest types that come from the shops from year to year; the dining car service is the best in the country. To be able to travel in a palatial train with no extra fare, other than the Pullman charge, a distance of 226 miles in five hours with every luxury, is certainly the climax of modern railroading.

Last September the writer, after transacting business in Washington, was compelled to be in New York at 8 o'clock P. M. of the same day.

The train selected was the “Royal Limited,” which left the Baltimore & Ohio station at Washington at 3 o'clock in the afternoon, affording the fastest schedule of five hours and enabling me to keep my appointment. It was one of those beautiful September days and the impressions received were delightful.

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