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SECTION VI.

A TALE OF A TUB.

We left Lord Peter in open rupture with his two brethren: both for ever discarded from his house, and resigned to the wide world, with little or nothing to trust to; which are circumstances that render them proper subjects for the charity of a writer's pen to work on; scenes of misery ever affording the fairest harvest 1) for great adventures. And in this the world may perceive the difference between the integrity of a generous author, and that of a common friend. The latter is observed to adhere close 2) in prosperity, but, on the decline of fortune, to drop suddenly off: whereas the generous author, just on the contrary, finds his hero on the dunghill, from thence by gradual steps raises him to a throne, and then immediately withdraws, expecting not so much as 3) thanks for his pains. In imitation of which example, I have placed Lord Peter in a noble house, given him a title to wear, and money to spend. There I shall leave him for some time; returning where common charity directs me, to the assistance of his two brothers, at their lowest ebb. However, I shall by no means forget my character of an historian, to follow 4) the truth, step by step, whatever happens, or whereever it may lead me.

The two exiles, so nearly united in fortune and interest, took a lodging together; where at their first leisure, they began to reflect on the numberless misfortunes and vexations 5) of their life past; and could not tell, on the sudden, to what failure in their conduct they ought to impute them; when, after some recollection, they called to mind the copy of their father's will,

1) harvest, Ernte, Ertrag; hier so viel als Ausbeute. 2) close, nahe an, fest. 3) not so much as, nicht einmal. 4) to follow, folgen, regiert wie das lateinische sequor und das französische suivre, einen Accusativ. — 5) misfortunes and vexations, d. h. über die Betrügereien des Papstes.

This was immediately

which they had so happily recovered. produced, and a firm resolution taken between them, to alter whatever was already amiss, and reduce all their future measures to the strictest obedience prescribed therein. The main body of the will as the reader cannot easily have forgot) – consisted in certain admirable rules about the wearing of their coats: in the perusal whereof, the two brothers, at every period, duly comparing the doctrine with the practice, there was never seen a wider difference between two things; horrible, downright transgressions of every point. Upon which they both resolved, without farther delay, to fall immediately upon reducing the whole exactly after their father's model.

But here it is good to stop the hasty reader, ever impatient to see the end of an adventure, before we writers can duly prepare him for it. I am to record, that these two brothers began to be distinguished at this time, by certain names. One of them desired to be called Martin '), and the other took the appellation of Jack ). These two had lived in much friendship and agreement, under the tyranny of their brother Peter; as it is the talent of fellow-sufferers') to do; men in misfortune being like men in the dark, to whom all colours are the same. But when they came forward into the world, and began to display themselves to each other, and to the light, their complexions appeared extremely different; which the present posture of their affairs gave them sudden opportunity to discover.

But here the severe reader may justly tax me as a writer of short memory; a deficiency to which a true modern cannot of necessity be a little subject; because memory, being an employment of the mind upon things past, is a faculty, for which the learned in our illustrious age have no manner of occasion, who deal entirely with invention, and strike all things out of themselves, or at least by collision, from each other: upon which account, we think it highly reasonable to produce our great for

6) forgot, veraltet statt forgotten. 7) Martin, d. i. Martin Luther. 9) fellow

8) Jack, d. i. Hans Calvin.

sufferer, Leidensgenoss.

getfulness, as an argument unanswerable for our great wit. I ought, in method, to have informed the reader, about fifty pages ago, of a fancy, Lord Peter took and infused into his brothers, to wear on their coats whatever trimmings came up in fashion; never pulling off any as they went out of the mode, but keeping on all together; which amounted in time 1o) to a medley, the most antic you 11) can possibly conceive; and this to a degree that there was I the time of their falling out, hardly a thread of the original coat to be seen, but an infinite quantity of lace and ribbands 12), and fringe, and embroidery, and points; (I mean only those tagged with silver 13), for the rest fell off). Now this material circumstance having been forgot in due place, as good fortune hath ordered, comes in very properly here, when 14) the two brothers are just going 15) to reform their vestures into the primitive state, prescribed by their father's will

They both unanimously entered upon this great work, looking sometimes on their coats, and sometimes on the will. "Martin laying the first hand; at one twitch) brought off a large handful of points; and with a second pull, stripped away ten dozen yards af fringe. But when he had gone thus far, he demurred 17) awhile. He knew very well, there yet remained a great deal more to be done. However, the first heat being over, his violence began to cool, and he resolved to proceed more moderately in the rest of the work; having already very

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10) in time, mit der Zeit. 11) you steht hier in der Bedeutung von man; eben so wird auch they manchmal gebraucht. 12) Zur Zeit der Reformation hatten die Päpste so viel Verzierungen gemacht, dass man kaum etwas von dem Urchristenthume erkennen konnte. 13) Die silbernen Nesteln sind das Geld, welches die Kirchen reich machte, und diess war die Wurzel des Christenthums unter den Päpsten. Vgl. Spittler's "Geschichte des Papstthums. 14) when deutet mehr auf die Zeit, und drückt eine unbestimmte Folge der Dinge aus, as dagegen bezeichnet das Aneinandergrenzen von Handlungen. 15) are just going, statt were just gaing, in Begriff waren.

16) twitch,

das schnelle Wegzupfen. 17) to demur, aufschieben, to demur awhile, so viel als: ein wenig inne halten.

narrowly escaped a swinging rent in pulling off the points, which, being tagged with silver (as we have observed before), the judicious workman had with much sagacity double sewn, to preserve them from falling. Resolving therefore to rid his coat of a huge quantity of gold lace, he picked up the stitches with much caution, and diligently gleaned out all the loose threads as he went; which proved to be a work of time. Then he fell about the embroidered Indian figures of men, women, and children; against which, as you have heard in its due place, their father's testament was extremely exact and severe: these, with much dexterity and application, were, after a while, quite eradicated, or utterly defaced. For the rest, where he observed the embroidery to be worked 18) so close; as not to be got away without damaging the cloth, or where it served to hide or strengthen any flaw 19) in the body of the coat, contracted by the perpetual tampering 20) of workmen upon it, he concluded the wisest course 21) was, to let it remain; resolving in no case whatsoever, that the substance of the stuff should suffer injury; which he thought the best method for serving the true intent and meaning of his father's will. And this is the nearest account I have been able to collect of Martin's proceedings upon this great revolution.

But his brother Jack, whose adventures will be so extraordinary, as to furnish 22) a great part in the remainder of this discourse, entered upon the matter with other thoughts, and a quite different spirit. For the memory of Lord Peter's injuries produced a degree of hatred 23) and spite, which had a much greater share of inciting him, than any regards after his father's commands; since these appeared at best only secondary and subservient to the other. However, for this medley of humour, he made a shift to find a very plausible name, honouring it with the title of zeal; which is perhaps the most significant

18) to work, flicken, sticken. 19) strengthen any flaw, wörtlich die Fluth (oder den Strom) stark zu machen, hier wohl so viel als ein Loch Zusammen zu halten. 20) tampering, das Hand - Anlegen, hier so viel als Herum zer21) course, Verfahrungsart. 22) as to furnish, statt

ren.

word that hath been ever yet produced in any language; as, I think, I have fully proved in my excellent analytical discourse upon that subject; wherein I have deduced an histori-theophysilogical account of zeal, shewing how it first proceeded from a notion into a word, and from thence, in a hot summer, ripened into a tangible substance. This work, containing three large volumes in folio, I design very shortly to publish, by the modern way of subscription; not doubting but 24) the nobility and gentry of the land will give me all possible encouragement, having had already such a taste of what I am able to perform.

I record therefore, that brother Jack, brimful of this miraculous compound, reflecting with indignation upon Peter's tyranny, and farther provoked by the despondency of Martin, prefaced his resolution to this purpose.,,What, (said he) a ,, rogue that locked up his drink, turned away our wives, cheated ,,us of our fortunes, palmed 25) his damned crusts upon us for mut,, ton, and at last kicked us, out of doors; must we be in his ,,fashions with a pox!26) a rascal, besides, that all the street ,, cries out against." Having thus kindled 27) and inflamed himself as high as possible, and by consequence in a delicate temper for beginning 28) a reformation, he set about the work immediately, and in three minutes made more dispatch than Martin had done in as many hours. For, courteous reader, you are given to understand, that zeal is never so highly obliged, as when you set it a tearing; and Jack, who doated on that quality in himself, allowed it at this time its full swing 29). Thus it happened, that stripping down a parcel of gold-lace a little too hastily, he rent the main body of his coat from top to bot

24) but bedeutet sowohl allein, als auch in Verbindung mit that, nach I do not doubt, I question not, I do not deny, it is not impossible etc. so viel als that. Hat nach to doubt not, der auf but folgende Satz mit dem vorhergehenden einerlei Subject, so wird das Verbum desselben auch in den Infinitiv gesetzt. 25) to palm upon, einem etwas aufheften, eine Nase drehen. 26) with a pox, i. e. what a por, was zum Henker. 27) to kindle, anfeuern. 28) for beginning, statt to begin. 29) swing, Lauf.

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