As thou hast prov'd it by their practice;
No argument like matter of fact is.
And we are best of all led to
Men's principles, by what they do.
Then let us straight advance in quest
Of this profound gymnosophist;
And as the fates and he advise,
Pursue, or wave this enterprise.

195

This said, he turn'd about his steed, And eftsoons on th' adventure rid;

200

Where leave we him and Ralph a while,
And to the conj'rer turn our style,

To let our reader understand

What's useful of him beforehand.

He had been long t'wards mathematics, 205 Optics, philosophy, and statics,

Magic, horoscopy, astrology,
And was old dog at physiologý :
But, as a dog that turns the spit,
Bestirs himself, and plies his feet
To climb the wheel, but all in vain,
His own weight brings him down again;
And still he's in the self-same place
Where at his setting out he was:

210

So in the circle of the arts

215

Did he advance his nat' ral parts;

205. From the occupation of Sidrophel, his name may

Till falling back still, for retreat,
He fell to juggle, cant, and cheat:

But with the moon was more familiar
Than e'er was almanack well-willer;
Her secrets understood so clear,

That some believ'd he had been there;

239

be derived from sidus (sideris) and 90s. There is a view of him in

Fig. 33.

as visible, in shadows, on the north side of the moon (the north being placed on the left hand), and appearing to look through a telescope at the star-like explosion of light so often mentioned as situate on the south side of the moon.

He made an instrument to know

If the moon shine at full or no;

261

That wou'd, as soon as e'er she shone, straight Whether 'twere day or night demonstrate; Tell what her d'meter t' an inch is,

265

And prove that she's not made of green cheese.
It would demonstrate, that the man in
The moon's a sea Mediterranean;

And that it is no dog or bitch,

Cape Snout's from promontory Tail.

He made a planetary gin,

Which rats would run their own heads in,
And come on purpose to be taken,
Without th' expense of cheese or bacon:
With lute-strings he would counterfeit
Maggots that crawl on dish or meat ;
Quote moles and spots on any place
O' th' body, by the index face;

280

A paltry wretch he had, half-starv'd, That him in place of Zany serv'd,

323

324. Figure 34 exhibits Whachum with a zany's or

Hight Whachum, bred to dash and draw, 325
Not wine, but more unwholesome law;
To make 'twixt words and lines huge gaps,
Wide as meridians in maps ;

To squander paper and spare ink,

Or cheat men of their words some think.

330

fool's cap on, and in the attitude of pumping, as mentioned in 335. He is situate over the head of Sidrophel, in pale light, with his head turned to the south side of the moon. As that portion of the moon which has just now been considered as resembling a pump, is often assimilated to an hour-glass, his name perhaps, as alluding to that circumstance, may have his derivation from wacht or watch.

Fig. 24.

327. Whachum's writings are referable to that portion of light in the moon which is situate on the right hand of the pump, and marked with lines or letters, and which, in the first canto, was assimilated to a mouse-trap, a shoe, &c., and is introduced in fig. 6, ante.

From this, by merited degrees
He'd to more advancement rise;
To be an under-conjuror,

Or journeyman-astrologer :

His business was to pump and wheedle,
And men with their own keys unriddle,
To make them to themselves give answers,
For which they pay the necromancers ;

To fetch and carry intelligence,

335

Of whom, and what, and where, and whence, And all discoveries disperse

341

Among the whole pack of conjurers ;
What cut-purses have left with them,
For the right owners to redeem ;

And what they dare not vent, find out,
To gain themselves and th' art repute:
Draw figures, schemes, and horoscopes,
Of Newgate, Bridewell, brokers' shops,
Of thieves ascendant in the cart;
And find out all by rules of art:
Which way a serving man that's run
With cloaths or money away, is

gone;

Who pick'd a fob at holding-forth,
And where a watch for half the worth
May be redeem'd; or stolen plate
Restor'd at conscionable rate.
Beside all this, he serv'd his master
In quality of poetaster:

345

350

355