it here;" and when the same servant was breaking a hard large coal, he said, "That is a stone, you blockhead."

From this time he was perfectly silent till the latter end of October, 174,; and then died without the least pang or convulsion, in the seventy-eighth year of his age!

SOME

PARTICULARS

CONCERNING

DR, SWIFT.

TAKEN FROM MRS. PILKINGTON'S MEMOIRS,

MRS. Pilkington's acquaintance with Dr. Swift commenced from sending him some verses on his birthday. These the Dean received very kindly, and said he would see her whenever she pleased.

Woman.

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A few days after, she was introduced to the Dean, in Dr. Delany's garden at Delville, by a gentleHe saluted her, and asked the lady, if she was her daughter? The lady smiled, and said, she was Mrs. Pilkington. What," says he, "this poor little child married! married! God help her, she is very early engaged in trouble." The Dean engaging Mr. Pilkington to preach for him at the cathedral next Sunday in St. Patrick's church, Mrs. Pilkington was charmed to see with what a becom

* See these verses in vol. XI. p. 3429 N.

"that

ing piety the Déan performed that holy service, which he had so much at heart, that he wanted not the assistance of the Liturgy, but went quite through it, without ever looking in the book. He bowed at the table; which behaviour was censured, as savouring of popery. But this circumstance may vindicate him from the wicked aspersion of being deemed an unbeliever, since it is plain he had the utmost reverence for the eucharist. Service being ended, the Dean was surrounded at the churchdoor by a crowd of poor; to all of whom he gave charity, except an old woman, who held out a very dirty band to him. He told her very gravely, though she was a beggar, water was not so scarce but she might have washed her hands." When they came to the Deanery, the Dean very kindly saluted Mrs. Pilkington, and without allowing her time to sit down, bade her come and see his library; but merrily told Mr. Pilkington, who was for following them, that he did not desire his company. "Well,', said he to her, "I have brought you here to show you all the money I got when I was in the ministry; but don't steal any of it." "I will not indeed, sir," said she. So opening a cabinet, he showed her a parcel of empty drawers : "Bless me," says he, "the money is flown." He then opened his bureau, wherein he had a great number of curious trinkets of various kinds, some of which were presented to him by the earl and countess of Oxford, lady Masham, and lady Betty Germain. At last coming to a drawer filled with medals, he bade her choose two for herself; but he could not help smiling, when she began to poise them in her hands, choosing them by weight rather than antiquity.

At dinner the Dean's behaviour was very huHe placed himself at the head of his table, opposite to a great pier glass, so that he could

mourous.

see in the glass whatever the servants did behind him. He was served entirely in plate, with great elegance, but the beef being overroasted, put the company all in confusion. The Dean called for the cookmaid, and ordered her to take the beef down stairs, and do it less. She answered very innocently, that she could not. Why, what sort of a creature are you," says he, "to commit a fault which cannot be amended?" And turning to Mrs. Pilkington he said very gravely," That he hoped as the cook was a woman of genius, he should, by this manner of arguing, be able, in about a year's time, to convince her she had better send up the meat too little than too much done?" charging the men servants, whenever they imagined the meat was ready, they should take it, spit and all, and bring it up by force, promising to aid them in case the cook resisted.

66

Having asked Mr. and Mrs. Pilkington if they could smoke? and being answered that they did not; It is a sign," said he, " you were neither of you bred in the university of Oxford; for drinking and smoking are the first rudiments of learning taught there; and in those two arts no university in Europe can outdo them." Having asked Mrs. Pilkington if she had any faults?" Pray, Mr. Dean," said Dr. Delany, "why will you be so unpolite as to suppose Mrs. Pilkington has any faults "I'll tell you," replied the Dean; "whenever I see a number of agreeable qualities in any person, I am always sure they have bad ones sufficient to poise the scale." Mrs. Pilkington bowed, and told him he did her great honour; in that copying bishop Berkeley, whom she had frequently heard declare, that when any speech was made to him, which

* Whom he always distinguished by the name of Swethant see p. 148. N.

might be construed either into a compliment or an afront, or that had two handles, he always took hold of the best. "if she

66

"A

The Dean then asked Mrs. Pilkington, were a queen what she would choose to have after dinner? She answered, "Your conversation, sir." Pooh," said he, "I mean, what regale." dish of coffee, sir," answered she. Why then," said he, "I will so far make you as happy as a queen; you shall have some in perfection: for, when I was chaplain to the earl of Berkeley, who was in the government here, I was so poor, I was obliged to keep a coffee house, and all the nobility resorted to it to talk treason.” The Dean then set about making the coffee: but the fire scorching his hand, he called to Mrs. Pilkington to reach him his glove; and changing the coffeepot to his left hand, held out his right one, ordering her to put the glove on it; which accordingly she did; when taking up part of his gown to fan himself with, and acting in character of a prudish lady, he said,

Well, I don't know what to think; women may be honest that do such things; but, for my part, I never could bear to touch any man's flesh-except my husband's; whom, perhaps," said he," she wished at the devil."

"Mr. Pilkington," said he, "you would not tell me your wife's faults; but I have found her out to be a d-n'd insolent, proud, unmannerly slut." "What has she done now?" said Mr. Pilkington. "Done!" said the Dean; why nothing but sat there quietly, and never once offered to interrupt me in making the coffee; whereas a lady of modern good breeding would have struggled with me for the coffeepot, until she had made me scald myself and her, and mide me throw the coffee in the fire, or perhaps at her head, rather than permit me to take so much trouble for her."

Mrs. Pilkington staid at home with the Dean dur❤ ing the time of the afternoon's service; and he made her read his " History of the last Session of Parliament and the Peace of Utrecht, written at Windsor in 1713," asking her at the conclusion of every period, whether she understood it?" for I would," said he, "have it intelligible to the meanest capacity; and, if you comprehend it, it is possible every body may."

She accompanied the Dean to evening prayer; and on their return to the Deanery, he told Mr. and Mrs. Pilkington, "that he gave them leave to stay to supper;" which, from him, was a sufficient in

vitation.

The Dean then missing his golden bottlescrew, told Mrs. Pilkington very sternly, "he was sure she had stolen it." She affirmed very seriously, "she had not." Upon which he looked for it: and found it where he himself had laid it: "It is well for you," said he, "that I have got it, or I would have charged you with theft.". Why, pray, sir,” said she, “should I be suspected more than any other person in the company?" For a very good reason," said he, "because you are the poorest.

66

At their going away, the Dean handed Mrs. Pilkington down all the steps to the coach, thanking them for the honour of their company, at the same time slipping into her hand as much money as Mr. Pilkington and she had given at the offering in the morning, and coach-hire also; which she durst not refuse, lest she should have been deemed as great a blockhead as the parson who refused thick

wine.

In one of the Dean's periodical fits of deafness, he sent for Mrs. Pilkington; who having come, he brought out a large book, finely bound in Turkey leather, and handsomely gilt; "This," said he, "is the Translation of the Epistles of Horace, a present to me from the author; it is a special good cover ;