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e wear it joyfully, as Thy Livery, and as a
Badge of my being thy Care. Amin. - Again he Praises God for that which few in this World do think a Blesling, but to too many is one of the most Afflicting Effects of Sickness.
'I Praise thee, O my Saviour, (says he,) for these paie Looks, this wan Visage, and for giving me such a Face as is not capable to Rival Thee nor Rob Thee of any Heart of thy Servants, which I fear the naughtiness of my own Heart if thou didst give me other
Looks, wou'd be apt to abuse to this End : s I dare not be secure of my self; I willing
ly accuse my self to Thee, my Lord, and < rejoice and biess Thee in that thou dost
put out of my power to be treacherous to
In the same place he pursues his Devotions in the following manner,
I Praile Thee, O my God, for making me <thy Care and for this proof of it, that thou Cart pleas’d to chastise me with thy fatherly < Rod. Two things I humbly beg of Thee, that <thou woud'it pardon those Sins which pros < voke thee to deal with me thus contrary to (thy Gracious Nature, and that thou woud'st
fanétifie thy Rod to me, that it may be effeis Ĉtual to remove my Sins, that thou may’lt
remove it without danger of my Souls re& turning to folly. Ainen.
These are some of Mr. Bonnell's. Meditati. ons and Prayers, of Sickncss and Pain; nor did his Practice at all, fall short of them ; for
that that Patience which he so earnestly pray'd for; he enjoy'd in a measure beyond the greatest part, even of good Men. When he has been in the greatest Anguish, with two very tormenting Distempers, (the Gravel and Cholick) he wou'd often say i Thy Will O God, thy Will be done with me, and upon me: I have no Will of my own, and rejoice in doing Thy Will. Q mhai Mercies are these Sufferings, if they be the may, God thinks fit to punish my Sins here, in order to spare me hereafter! How much greater were my Saviour's Sufferings upon the Crojs! Did he undergo fach Agonies for my Sins, and shall not I chearfully submit to, and embrace what ever God fees fit to lay upon me! With much more, to the same purpose, in every fit of Pain. When any Medicine was given him, he wou'd, after begging God's Bleding, take it ; and then wou'd usually fay, It is better than I deo ferve; I bless God for it, and for giving me such
Asistances in this Extremity. Ob? bow many of his better Servants, want these Comforts! Blessed be his Holy Name, for giving them to me.
Nor was he only patient under Bodily Pains, but submissive to the Will, and satisfied with the Wisdom of God in every Affair of Life, under every Disappointment, Diffi. culty and Trouble. He considered that God gives us different Talents, different Capacities and Employments, and will not proportion our Reward to the part he gave us to act, but our Faithfulness in it. To this purpose is the following Meditation upon i Sam. 30. 24. And it was so from thar Day forward, that he
of Business circumino Favour in
made it a Statute and an Ordinance for Israel unto this day, that as his part is that goeth domon to the Battle, lo shall bis pary be that tarrieth by the Stuff; they shall part alike.
O Blessed Son of David, and Captain of our Salvation, under whose Banner thy Ser. vants fight, and are thy Sworn Soldiers to their Lives End; when I hear some say thy
Toke is easie and thy Burden light and they seem 'to speak as they think, because they find
not much difficulties in Life, but run on in <a happy and even composure of Health, and
of Business proportiond to their strength,
freed by their circumstances from violent < Temptations, and by thy Favour in framing thein from strong Pasions, (tho' I own and
exultingly declare with them, that thy Yoke " is indeed an easie Yoke, and thy Service per- fect freedom, and that the keeping thy Com(mandments is its own infinitely abundant "Reward ; yet) I consider that in Warfare all (have not the same Posts of Hardship and
Danger. Some Confront the Enemies and ( some must stay by the Stuff What earthly " Commander knows how to suit these parts
exactly to his Men? But thou, O Lord, (dost it with the highest degree of Wisdom,
and fitness to thy several Soldiers strength
and abilities. And because thou givest ? each his Burden according to his might in
nicest Equity, therefore thou hast ordain'd it for a perpetual Law to them, that those that tarry by the Stuff shall part alike with those that confront the Enemy. Both snare
fect from an ealia with a
each abilitie. Co thy ghen put th
« alike in thy Favour, both enjoy alike thy 'Love, and both partake alike in thy Glotry: Only here is the Difference ; not who
have had the hardest Posts, but who have behaved themselves faithfully in the Posts they had, whether hard or easie, shall be re
warded by Thee, de Solf.De Such was Mr. Bonnell's Humility, such was
was his Meekness and Patience; and agreeable to these, was his Mortification and Self- denial; a Grace which always proceeds from a meek and lowly Spirit. I mall not here speak of his Mortisication in point of Fascing, and the great Severity of his Life ; That must be reserved for another place. The Mortification here meant, and what Mr. Bonnell constantly labour'd after, was an unconcern'd Indifference to the World ; 'to its Profits and Pleasures, to Honour and Fame ; and all the other Idols of Mankind. His great Endeavour was, to gain the entire Mastery of his Will and Affections; and so to discipline and tame them, that they might not grow Stubborn and Rebellious. In order to this, his usual Practice, wąs to deny himself in small matters, to which he found his Inclinations prompted him, that so they might be under his Government in greater. This point, lie had nicely confider'd, and treats of it in feveral places of his Writings, with his usual Piety and Judgment; as will appear from one or two Meditations upon this Subject.
. That denying our selves in particular, and little Instances of lawful Enjoyments, s, is not (says he) a superstitious and unprofita'ble Exercile; appears from hence, that God,
who is a bountiful Rewarder of a Cup of Cold Water, gives us good Thoughts for it; which (flow into our Minds, with a sensibly, more 'freedom, and affectingness, upon such Occa
sion, than at other tinies. On the contrary, Cour not complying with such a Hint, when
we have a Motion to deny our selves, in 'small things; but yielding to our Appetite, For Curiolity, and perhaps palliating our (doing so, with saying, that it is a Trifle, not < fit to make a Sacrifice of to God, deprives us r of good Thoughts, and hardens our Mind's 6 against them; unless we recover our selves, < by being humbled before God, and fortifycing our Resolution against the next Encounster. For tho' this yielding to our Appe<tite, be not a Sin ; yet it has such a Resem? blance, and image of Sin, that no lover of c God, but ought to have an aversion to it. . What is Sin, but giving way to our Appectites and Inclinations, against the Checks of
our Conscience? The head-strong vio. < lence of our Wills, carrying away forci. c bly our Powers and Faculties, to act as gainst our Reason and Understanding. And < this agrees so far with sin, that it is an • Instance, tho' in a lesser degree, of the <head-strong unruliness of our Will, carrycing us on to act; tho' not against our Con<sciences, because the Matter of it is lawful; 6 yet against the Counsel of our Reason, exĆ horting us to exercise our selves, in little