or in company, read or write, just as I please. I want nothing but more thankfulness to the Lord, and more intimate communion with Him. It is a mercy to know that these are things above all others truly desirable. Accept my best love and thanks, and believe me to be Your affectionate and obliged servant, P., near L., 12th August, 1784. LETTER III. MY DEAR SIR, THE first office I intended for my silver pen, was to give you information of our safe arrival in Charles'Square. Accordingly I now hansel it. I will not search for silver words to express our thanks to you and Mrs. T. for your great kindness; suffice it to say that we love you dearly. May the Lord, for whose sake you took us strangers in, reward you. But words of gold would not be sufficient to express the praise due to our good and great Shepherd, who led us out in peace, was with us by the way in our journey, and brought us home in safety. He preserved our habitation likewise, and those whom we left behind, so that we saw or heard nothing upon our return to cause uneasiness. We reached Hook in about three hours after we left you, and arrived at home a little before four. My dear's head is not quite well to-day. Eliza was a little fatigued, but a dish or rather many dishes of tea, refreshed us. We unite in making up a parcel of our best love to you, Mrs. T., and all your young people, with our hearty thanks to each and all of them, for the kindness they shewed us. I seem at present a stranger even at home, but by to-morrow (I hope) my thoughts will get into their own channel, and I hope (and beg your prayers for it) that the Lord will enable me to benefit by the recollection of what I have seen or heard while abroad. My late excursion was very pleasant, but I ought to wish it may be made profitable. But I have had long experience how little I am able to improve by the most desirable advantages, and how little I am affected by a combination of the greatest mercies. I may express all my complaints in one short sentence, I am a poor creature; and all my hopes and comforts may be summed up as briefly, by saying, I have a rich and gracious Saviour. Full as I am in myself of inconsistencies and conflicts, I have in Him a measure of peace. He found me in a waste howling wilderness; He redeemed me from the house of misery and bondage, and though I have been ungrateful and perverse, He has not yet forsaken me; I trust He never will; "unsustained by thee I fall;" but He is able to hold even me up; to pity, support and supply me to the end of life. How suitable a Saviour; He is made all things to those who have nothing, and is engaged to help those who can do nothing. I expect this will come in season to tell you, that while reading it, I hope my heart will be thinking of you, and desiring a Sabbath's blessing upon you and yours. I shall then be preparing to meet my beloved people at St. Mary, Woolnoth. Think of me in the same way; pray for me, that I may return to them "in the fulness of the blessings of the Gospel of Christ." Though we are near eighty miles distant from each other, we can easily meet at the throne of grace. Prayer can ascend you are from S. and London, and bring back an answer of blessings to both places in the same minute. I have still the same light and the same sun as when I was with you, and thus the Lord is the same, and equally near to us all. What an honor and privilege is it to know the way to the mercy-seat, and to be permitted to plead in that name which always prevails. Tell Mrs. K. I shall not forget her request. I hope the Lord will spare her child, to be a comfort to her; but should He appoint otherwise, He will be faithful to His promise, and make her strength equal to her day. I can venture to assure her, that the child shall certainly recover, if He who is infinitely wise, sees it best for her upon the whole. But we are short-sighted creatures, not only unworthy, but unable to choose for ourselves; if the choice was left to us, it would be our wisdom to refer it back to Him, and we may be sure that He does not willingly grieve or afflict us. He takes no pleasure in seeing us weep and mourn; rather, every day brings us ten thousand proofs that He delighteth in our prosperity. When we are in heaviness, therefore, there is a need-be for it-faithful are the wounds of such a friend; they are made no sooner, nor longer, than the exigency of the case requires; and He who wounds has promised likewise to heal. He is all sufficient, and can give more than He will ever take away from his children. I trust she will find power to commit herself, and her every concern, into His hands; and that she will have reason to acknowledge, from day to day, that He doth all things well. I am, very sincerely, Dear sir, Your affectionate and much obliged servant, JOHN NEWTON, Charles'-Square, 3rd Sept, 1784. LETTER IV. MY DEAR SIR AND MADAM, My first letter is due to you, and if I was to fill it with thanks, I should not say half enough. Let me say once more I thank you, we both thank you, we all thank you. The Lord brought us home safely at three o'clock. Eliza bore her journey very well. B. and I followed in good time. We had a very pleasant journey. St. Paul's struck six when we came to it. I am now to get into my round again. When I saw your horse* the other morning going round and round with the wheel, it reminded me of myself. The horse would be better pleased, I suppose, if he was at liberty to scamper about; but his service and usefulness depend upon treading the same steps over and over again. So I, if I had my will, might perhaps be seen sometimes in twenty places distant from home, and often at S., but the wheel to which I am fastened, and which marks out the track and circle of my duty, is in London. Your horse I suppose is blinded to prevent his growing giddy. I do not wish to be blinded, but I wish to move simply and quietly step by step in the Lord's path without looking about me, without questioning or reasoning. I am not my own, but belong of right to Him who paid my ransom, and delivered me from the house of bondage, from the power of Satan, and therefore I am not to do my own will, or be at my own disposal. This is my duty, and it is my privilege likewise. For He who requires me to give up all to Him, engages to be, and to do all for me. I shall not want, I need not fear, if the Lord be my Shepherd. O what Before Mr. T's mills went by water. a guard, what a guide, what a protector, what a comforter is He to all who put their trust in Him, and devote themselves to His will. My late visit was pleasant, and I hope in the review of what passed I shall be enabled to find some profit. As iron sharpeneth iron, so there is a mutual benefit arising from the communications of Christians who meet and converse in a right spirit. I would be thankful for what I know of this, and wish to be thankful that I have been at S. twice, and I can truly say that I shall be very willing to go a third time, if the Lord should ever make my way clear to you. I know no place to which inclination would sooner lead me, or where I seem to feel more at home. I shall think of Mrs. T. daily, till I hear of the event, of which I hope you will favour me with as early an information as you conveniently can. I send her Nehem. ch. i. verse 7. as a good cordial, which has been tried and approved by many. Hoxton, I am, dear sir and madam, 17th September, 1785. LETTER V. MY DEAR MADAM, I MUST address a line or two to you. I have good reason to think of you and Mr. T. daily, and could wish, if I durst wish for any thing, to be nearer you, and more with you. But we are placed like centinels in our respective posts, and we must not leave them oftener, nor longer, than our great Commander directs. |