The whole world was not half so wide

To Alexander, when he cry'd,
Because he had but one to subdue,

As was a paltry narrow tub to
Diogenes, who is not said

(For aught that ever I could read)

To whine, put finger i̇' th' eye, and sob,
Because h' had ne'er another tub.
The ancients make two sev'ral kinds

Of prowess in heroic minds,
The active and the passive valiant ;
Both which are pari libra gallant:
For both to give blows and to carry,
In fights are equi-necessary;
But in defeats, the passive stout
Are always found to stand it out
Most desp'rately, and to outdo
The active 'gainst a conqu'ring foe.
Tho' we with blacks and blues are sugill'd, 1
Or, as the vulgar say, are cudgell'd;

He that is valiant, and dares fight,

Though drubb'd, can lose no honour by 't.
Honour's a lease for lives to come,

And cannot be extended from
The legal tenant: 'tis a chattel
Not to be forfeited in battle.
If he that in the field is slain
Be in the bed of honour lain,
He that is beaten may be said
To lie in honour's truckle-bed.
For as we see th' eclipsed sun
By mortals is more gazed upon,

1021

1030

1040

1050

Than when adorn'd with all his light,
He shines in serene sky most bright;
So valour, in a low estate,

Is most admired and wonder'd at.

Quoth Ralph, How great I do not know
We may by being beaten grow;
But none that see how here we sit,
Will judge us overgrown with wit.
As gifted brethren, preaching by
A carnal hour-glass, do imply
Illumination can convey
Into them what they have to say,
But not how much; so well enough
Know you to charge, but not draw off:
For who, without a cap and bauble,
Having subdued a Bear and rabble,
And might with honour have come off,
Would put it to a second proof?
A politic exploit, right fit
For Presbyterian zeal and wit.

Quoth Hudibras, That cuckoo's tone,
Ralpho, thou always harp'st upon :
When thou at anything would'st rail,
Thou mak'st Presbytery thy scale
To take the height on't, and explain
To what degree it is profane;

Whats'ever will not with (thy what-d'ye-call)

1054

1060

1070

Thy light jump right, thou call'st synodical; 1080
As if Presbytery were a standard,

To size whats'ever's to be slander'd.
Dost not remember how, this day,

Thou to my beard wast bold to say,
That thou could'st prove bear-baiting equal

With synods, orthodox and legal ?

Do, if thou canst, for I deny't,
And dare thee to't, with all thy light.

Quoth Ralpho, Truly that is no
Hard matter for a man to do,
That has but any guts in 's brains,
And could believe it worth his pains:
But since you dare and urge me to it,
You'll find I've light enough to do it.
Synods are mystical Bear-gardens,
Where Elders, Deputies, Church wardens,
And other members of the Court,
Manage the Babylonish sport;

For Prolocutor, Scribe, and Bear-ward,
Do differ only in a mere word.
Both are but several synagogues
Of carnal men, and Bears and Dogs:
Both Antichristian assemblies,

To mischief bent as far 's in them lies:
Both stave and tail, with fierce contests,
The one with men, the other beasts.
The diff'rence is, the one fights with
The tongue, the other with the teeth ;
And that they bait but Bears in this,
In th' other Souls and Consciences;

Where Saints themselves are brought to stake
For Gospel-light, and Conscience' sake;

Exposed to Scribes and Presbyters,
Instead of mastiff Dogs and Curs:
Than whom they've less humanity,
For these at souls of men will fly.
This to the Prophet did appear,
Who in a vision saw a Bear,
Prefiguring the beastly rage

Of Church-rule, in this latter age;

1087

1100

1110

1120

As is demonstrated at full

By him that baited the Pope's Bull.1
Bears nat❜rally are beasts of prey,
That live by rapine; so do they.
What are their Orders, Constitutions,
Church-censures, Curses, Absolutions,
But sev'ral mystic chains they make
To tie poor Christians to the stake;
And then set Heathen officers,
Instead of Dogs, about their ears?
For to prohibit and dispense,
To find out, or to make offence;
Of Hell and Heaven to dispose,
To play with souls at fast and loose;
To set what characters they please,
And mulcts on sin or godliness;
Reduce the Church to Gospel-order,
By rapine, sacrilege, and murder;
To make Presbytery supreme,

1121

1130

And Kings themselves submit to them;

1140

And force all people, though against

Their consciences, to turn Saints;
Must prove a pretty thriving trade,
When Saints monopolists are made:
When pious frauds and holy shifts
Are Dispensations and Gifts;
Their godliness becomes mere ware,
And every Synod but a fair.

Synods are whelps of th' Inquisition,
A mongrel breed of like pernicion;

1150

Baited the Pope's bull:' a learned divine in King James's time wrote

a polemic work against the Pope, and gave it that unlucky nickname of 'The Pope's bull baited.'

And growing up, became the sires

Of Scribes, Commissioners, and Triers; 1
Whose bus'ness is, by cunning sleight,

To cast a figure for men's light;
To find, in lines of beard and face,
The physiognomy of grace;
And by the sound and twang of nose,
If all be sound within, disclose;
Free from a crack or flaw of sinning,
As men try pipkins by the ringing;
By black caps, underlaid with white,
Give certain guess at inward light;
Which sergeants2 at the Gospel wear,
To make the Spiritual Calling clear.
The handkerchief about the neck
Canonical cravats of Smec,

From whom the institution came,

When Church and State they set on flame,

And worn by them as badges then
Of Spiritual Warfaring-men)
Judge rightly if Regeneration
Be of the newest cut in fashion:
Sure 'tis an orthodox opinion,

That grace is founded in dominion.
Great piety consists in pride;

To rule is to be sanctify'd:

:

1151

1160

1170

Triers the Houses appointed certain persons to try men for ruling elders in every congregation.—2 ‘Sergeants '-at-law wore a coif.—3 ‘Canonical cravat:' Smectymnus was a club of five parliamentarians; they wore handkerchiefs about their necks for a note of distinction (as the officers of the Parliament-army then did), which afterwards degenerated into cravats. About the beginning of the long Parliament, in the year 1641, these five wrote a book against Episcopacy and the Common Prayer, to which they all subscribed their names, being Stephen Marshall, Edmund Calamy, Thomas Young, Matthew Newcomen, William Spurstow, and from thence they and their followers were called Smectymnus.