he intends to do all other things, to that number*; and for that end to drop the former Martin, and to substitute in his place lady Bess's institution, which is to pass under the name of Martin in the sequel of this true History. This weighty point being cleared, the Author goes on, and describes mighty quarrels and squabbles between Jack and Martin; how sometimes the one had the better, and sometimes the other, to the great desolation of both farms, till at last both sides concur to hang up the landlord, who pretended to die a martyr for Martin, though he had been true to neither side, and was suspected by many to have a great affection for Peter.

A DIGRESSION, ON THE NATURE, USEFULNESS, AND NECESSITY OF WARS AND QUARRELS.

THIS being a matter of great consequence, the Author intends to treat it methodically, and at large, in a treatise apart, and here to give only some hints of what his large treatise contains. The state of war, natural to all creatures. War is an attempt to take by violence from others, a part of what they have, and we want. Every man, fully sensible of his own merit, and finding it not duly regarded by others, has a natural right to take from them all that he thinks due to himself; and every

* A panegyrical Essay upon the number THREE is among the treatises advertised at the beginning of The Tale of a Tub. creature,

creature, finding its own wants more than those of others, has the same right to take every thing its nature requires. Brutes, much more modest in their pretensions this way, than men; and mean men more than great ones. The higher one raises his pretensions this way, the more bustle he makes about them; and the more success he has, the greater hero. Thus greater souls, in proportion to their superiour merit, claim a greater right to take every thing from meaner folks. This the true foundation of grandeur and heroism, tion of degrees among men.

and of the distincWar therefore neces

sary to establish subordination, and to found cities, kingdoms, &c. as also to purge bodies politick of gross humours. Wise princes find it necessary to have wars abroad, to keep peace at home. War, famine, and pestilence, the usual cures for corruptions in bodies politick. A comparison of these three. The Author is to write a panegyrick on each of them. The greatest part of mankind loves war more than peace. They are but few and meanspirited that live in peace with all men. Tre modest and meek of all kinds, always a prey to those of more noble or stronger appetites. The inclina. tion to war universal: Those that cannot, or dare not make war in person, employ others to do it for them. This maintains bullies, bravoes, cut-throats, lawyers, soldiers, &c. Most professions would be useless if all were peaceable. Hence brutes want neither smiths nor lawyers, magistrates nor joiners, soldiers nor surgeons. Brutes, having but narrow appetites, are incapable of carrying on, or perpetuating war against their own species, or of being led out in troops and multitudes to destroy one another.

another. These prerogatives proper to man alone. The excellency of human nature demonstrated, by the vast train of appetites, passions, wants, &c. that attend it. This matter to be more fully treated in the Author's Panegyrick on Mankind.

THE HISTORY OF MARTIN.

How Jack, having got rid of the old landlord, set up another to his mind, quarrelled with Martin, and turned him out of doors. How he pillaged all his shops, and abolished the whole dispensatory. How the new landlord laid about him, mauled Peter, worried Martin, and made the whole neighbourhood tremble. How Jack's friends fell out among themselves, split into a thousand parties, turned all things topsyturvy, till every body grew weary of them; and at last, the blustering landlord dying, Jack was kicked out of doors, a new landlord brought in, and Martin reestablished. How this new landlord let Martin do what he pleased, and Martin agreed to every thing his pious landlord desired, provided Jack might be kept low. Of several efforts Jack made to raise up his head, but all in vain; till at last the landlord died, and was succeeded by one who was a great friend to Peter, who, to humble Martin, gave Jack some liberty. How Martin grew enraged at this, called in a foreigner, and turned out the landlord; in which Jack concurred with Martin, because this landlord was entirely devoted to Peter, into whose arms he threw himself, and left his country. How

the

the new landlord secured Martin in the full possession of his former rights, but would not allow him to destroy Jack, who had always been his friend. How Jack got up his head in the North, and put himself in possession of a whole canton, to the great discontent of Martin, who, finding also that some of Jack's friends were allowed to live and get their bread in the South parts of the country, grew highly discontent with the new landlord he had called in to his assistance. How this landlord kept Martin in' order, upon which he fell into a raging fever, and swore he would hang himself, or join in with Peter, unless Jack's children were all turned out to starve.

f several attempts made to cure Martin, and make peace between him and Jack, that they might unite against Peter; but all made ineffectual by the great address of a number of Peter's friends, that herded among Martin's, and appeared the most zealous for his interest. How Martin, getting abroad in this mad fit, looked so like Peter in his air and dress, and talked so like him, that many of the neighbours could not distinguish the one from the other; especially when Martin went up and down strutting in Peter's armour, which he had borrowed to fight Jack. What remedies were used to cure Martin's distemper,

*

*

Here the Author being seized with a fit of dulness (to which he is very subject) after having read a poetical Epistle addressed to *** it entirely composed his senses, so that he has not writ a line since.

N. B. Some things that follow after this are not in the MS. but seem to have been written since, to fill up the place of what was not thought convenient hen to print,

A PRO

A PROJECT,

FOR THE UNIVERSAL BENEFIT OF MANKIND.

THE Author, having laboured so long and done so much to serve and instruct the publick, without any advantage to himself, has at last thought of a project, which will tend to the great benefit of all mankind, and produce a handsome revenue to the author. He intends to print by subscription, in 96 large volumes in folio, an exact description of Terra Australis incognita, collected with great care and pains from 999 learned and pious authors, of undoubted veracity. The whole work, illustrated with maps and cuts agreeable to the subject, and done by the best masters, will cost but one guinea each volume to subscribers, one guinea to be paid in advance, and afterwards a guinea on receiving each volume, except the last. This work will be of great use for all men, and necessary for all families, because it contains exact accounts of all the provinces, colonies, and mansions, of that spacious country, where, by a general doom, all transgressors of the law are to be transported: and every one having this work may choose out the fittest and best place for himself, there being enough for all, so as every one shall be fully satisfied.

The author supposes that one copy of this work will be bought at the publick charge, or out of the

parish