1555

As at thanksgivings th' used to do;
Each in a tattered talisman,

Like vermin in effigy slain.

'But, what's more dreadful than the rest, Those rumps are but the tail o' th' beast, Set up to popish engineers,

1560 As by the crackers plainly appears;
For none but jesuits have a mission
To preach the faith with ammunition,,
And propagate the church with powder;
Their founder was a blown-up soldier.
Since first they failed in their designs,
To take in heaven by springing mines,
And, with unanswerable barrels
1570 Of gunpowder, dispute their quarrels,
Now take a course more practicable,
By laying trains to fire the rabble,
And blow us up, in th' open streets,
Disguised in rumps, like sambenites,
More like to ruin and confound,
Than all their doctrines under ground.
'Nor have they chosen rumps amiss,
For symbols of state-mysteries;

1575

Though some suppose, 'twas but to shew

1580 How much they scorned the saints, the few, Who, 'cause they 're wasted to the stumps, Are represented best by rumps.

But jesuits have deeper reaches

In all their politic far-fetches;

1585 And from the Coptic priest, Kircherus,
Found out this mystic way to jeer us:
For, as th' Egyptians us'd by bees.
T' express their antique Ptolemies,

And by their stings, the swords they wore, go Held forth authority and power;

1590

Because these subtle animals

Bear all their interests in their tails;
But when they're once impaired in that,
Are banished their well-ordered state:
1595 They thought all governments were best,
By hieroglyphic rumps expressed.

For, as in bodies natural,

The rump's the fundament of all,
So, in a commonwealth or realm,
1600 The government is called the helm;
With which, like vessels under sail,
They 're turned and winded by the tail;
The tail, which birds and fishes steer
Their courses with, through sea and air;
1605 To whom the rudder of the rump is

The same thing with the stern and compass;
This shows, how perfectly the rump
And commonwealth in nature jump.
For as a fly that goes to bed,

1610 Rests with his tail above his head,
So, in this mongrel state of ours,
The rabble are the supreme powers,
That horsed us on their backs, to show us
A jadish trick at last, and throw us.

1615

'The learned rabbins of the Jews

Write, there's a bone, which they call Luez, I' th' rump of man, of such a virtue, No force in nature can do hurt to; And therefore, at the last great day, 1620 All th' other members shall, they say, Spring out of this, as from a seed

All sorts of vegetals proceed;

From whence the learned sons of art,

Os sacrum justly style that part:

1625 Then what can better represent,

Than this rump bone, the parliament? That after several rude ejections, And as prodigious resurrections, With new reversions of nine lives, 1630 Starts up, and, like a cat, revives? But now, alas! they're all expired, And th' house, as well as members, fired; Consumed in kennels by the rout, With which they other fires put out; 1635 Condemned t' ungoverning distress, And paltry private wretchedness; Worse than the devil to privation, Beyond all hopes of restoration; And parted, like the body and soul, 1640 From all dominion and control. We, who could lately, with a look, Enact, establish, or revoke, Whose arbitrary nods gave law, And frowns kept multitudes in awe; 1645 Before the bluster of whose huff, All hats, as in a storm, flew off; Adored and bowed to by the great, Down to the footman and valet ;

Had more bent knees than chapel-mats, 1650 And prayers than the crowns of hats, Shall now be scorned as wretchedly; For ruin 's just as low as high; Which might be suffered were it all The horror that attends our fall: 1655 For some of us have scores more large Than heads and quarters can discharge; And others, who, by restless scraping, With public frauds, and private rapine, Have mighty heaps of wealth amassed, 1660 Would gladly lay down all at last;

1665

And, to be but undone, entail

Their vessels on perpetual jail,

And bless the devil to let them farms
Of forfeit souls on no worse terms.'

This said, a near and louder shout
Put all th' assembly to the rout,
Who now began t' outrun their fear,
As horses do, from those they bear;
But crowded on with so much haste,
1670 Until th' had blocked the passage fast,
And barricadoed it with haunches

Of outward men, and bulks and paunches,
That with their shoulders strove to squeeze,
And rather save a crippled piece

1675 Of all their crushed and broken members,
Than have them grillied on the embers;
Still pressing on with heavy packs
Of one another on their backs,
The van-guard could no longer bear
1680 The charges of the forlorn rear,
But, borne down headlong by the rout
Were trampled sorely under foot;
Yet nothing proved so formidable,
As th' horrid cookery of the rabble;
1685 And fear, that keeps all feeling out,
As lesser pains are by the gout,
Relieved 'em with a fresh supply
Of rallied force, enough to fly,
And beat a Tuscan running-horse,
1690 Whose jockey-rider is all spurs.

PART III.-CANTO III.

THE ARGUMENT.

The knight and squire's prodigious flight
To quit th' enchanted bower by night.
He plods to turn his amorous suit,
Ta plea in law, and prosecute:
Repairs to counsel, to advise
'Bout managing the enterprise;
But first resolves to try by letter,

And one more fair address, to get her.

WHO would believe what strange bugbears

WHO

Mankind creates itself, of fears,

That spring, like fern, that insect weed,
Equivocally, without seed,

5 And have no possible foundation,
But merely in th' imagination?

And yet can do more dreadful feats
Than hags, with all their imps and teats;
Make more bewitch and haunt themselves,

10 Than all their nurseries of elves.

15

For fear does things so like a witch,
'Tis hard t' unriddle which is which;
Sets up communities of senses,

To chop and change intelligences;

As Rosicrucian virtuosos

Can see with ears, and hear with noses;