PART II. CANTO II.

THE ARGUMENT.

The Knight and Squire in hot dispute,
Within an ace of falling out,

Are parted with a sudden fright
Of strange alarm, and stranger sight;
With which adventuring to stickle,
They're sent away in nasty pickle.

'Tis strange how some men's tempers suit
(Like bawd and brandy) with dispute;
That for their own opinions stand fast,

Only to have them claw'd and canvast;
That keep their consciences in cases,
As fiddlers do their crowds and bases,
Ne'er to be us'd but when they 're bent
To play a fit for argument;

Make true and false, unjust and just,
Of no use but to be discust;

Dispute, and set a paradox

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Like a straight boot upon the stocks,

And stretch it more unmercifully

Than Helmont, Montaigne, White, or Tully.
So th' ancient Stoics, in their porch,

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V. 2. Var. 'Brandee.'

V. 14. Var. 'Montaign and Lully.'

With fierce dispute maintain'd their church,
Beat out their brains in fight and study
To prove that virtue is a body,
That bonum is an animal

Made good with stout polemic brawl;
In which some hundreds on the place
Were slain outright, and many a face
Retrench'd of nose, and eyes, and beard,
To maintain what their sect averr'd.

All which the Knight and Squire, in wrath,
Had like t' have suffer'd for their faith;
Each striving to make good his own,

As by the sequel shall be shown.

The sun had long since in the lap

Of Thetis taken out his nap,

And, like a lobster boil'd, the morn

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But first with knocking loud, and bawling,
He rous'd the Squire in truckle lolling;

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And after many circumstances,

Which vulgar authors in romances

Do use to spend their time and wits on,
To make impertinent description,

They got (with much ado) to horse,

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And to the Castle bent their course,

In which he to the Dame before
To suffer whipping-duty swore.

Where now arriv'd, and half unharnest,
To carry on the work in earnest,

He stopp'd, and paus'd upon the sudden,
And with a serious forehead plodding,
Sprung a new scruple in his head,
Which first he scratch'd and after said,
Whether it be direct infringing

An oath, if I should wave this swinging,
And what I've sworn to bear forbear,
And so b' equivocation swear;

Or whether 't be a lesser sin

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55

To be forsworn than act the thing,

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Are deep and subtle points, which must,
T' inform my Conscience, be discust;

V. 48. Var. 'Whipping duly swore.'

V. 55, 56. This dialogue between Hudibras and Ralph sets before us the hypocrisy and villany of all parties of the Rebels with regard to oaths; what equivocations and evasions they made use of to account for the many perjuries they were dai. ly guilty of, and the several oaths they readily took, and as readily broke, merely as they found it suited their interest, as appears from v. 107, &c. and v. 377, &c. of this Canto, and Part III. Canto III. v. 547, &c. Archbishop Bramhall says, "That the hypocrites of those times, though they magnified the obligation of an oath, yet in their own case dispensed with all oaths, civil, military, and religious. We are now told," says he, "that the oaths we have taken are not to be examined according to the interpretation of men: No! How then? -Surely according to the interpretation of devils."

In which to err a tittle may
To errors infinite make way:
And therefore I desire to know
Thy judgment ere we further go.

Quoth Ralpho, Since you do enjoin it,
I shall enlarge upon the point;
And, for my own part, do not doubt
Th' affirmative may be made out.
But first, to state the case aright,
For best advantage of our light:
And thus 'tis: Whether 't be a sin
To claw and curry your own skin,
Greater or less than to forbear,
And that you are forsworn forswear.

But first o' th' first: The inward man,

And outward, like a clan and clan,

Have always been at daggers-drawing,
And one another clapper-clawing:
Not that they really cuff or fence,

But in a spiritual mystic sense;

Which to mistake, and make 'em squabble

In literal fray, 's abominable.

"Tis Heathenish, in frequent use

With Pagans and apostate Jews,
To offer sacrifice of Bridewells,
Like modern Indians to their idols;
And mongrel Christians of our times,
That expiate less with greater crimes,
And call the foul abomination
Contrition and mortification.

Is't not enough we're bruis'd and kicked
With sinful members of the Wicked;
Our vessels, that are sanctify'd,

Profan'd and curry'd back and side;

But we must claw ourselves with shameful
And Heathen stripes, by their example?
Which (were there nothing to forbid it)
Is impious, because they did it.
This, therefore, may be justly reckon'd
A heinous sin. Now to the second:
That saints may claim a dispensation
To swear and forswear on occasion,
I doubt not but it will appear

With pregnant light; the point is clear.

Oaths are but words, and words but wind;

Too feeble implements to bind ;

And hold with deeds proportion, so

As shadows to a substance do.

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The weaker vessel should submit.

Then when they strive for place, 'tis fit

Although your Church be opposite

To ours as Blackfriars are to White,

In rule and order, yet I grant

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You are a Reformado saint;

And what the saints do claim as due,
You may pretend a title to.

But Saints, whom oaths and vows oblige,
Know little of their privilege;

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Further (I mean) than carrying on

Some self-advantage of their own.