The same old sore breaks out from age to age With much the same result. Now I myself, A Tory to the quick, was as a boy
Destructive, when I had not what I would. I was at school - —a college in the South: There lived a flayflint near; we stole his fruit, His hens, his eggs; but there was law for us; We paid in person. He had a sow, sir. She, With meditative grunts of much content, Lay great with pig, wallowing in sun and mud. By night we dragged her to the college tower From her warm bed, and up the corkscrew stair With hand and rope we haled the groaning sow, And on the leads we kept her till she pigged. Large range of prospect had the mother sow, And but for daily loss of one she loved,
As one by one we took them - but for this.
As never sow was higher in this world →
Might have been happy: but what lot is pure? We took them all, till she was left alone Upon her tower, the Niobe of swine, And so returned unfarrowed to her sty.
John. They found you out?
James. Not they.
John. Well-after all
What know we of the secret of a man?
What ails us who are sound,
That we should mimic this raw fool the world,
Which charts us all in its coarse blacks or whites,
As ruthless as a baby with a worm,
As cruel as a schoolboy ere he grows
To Pity-more from ignorance than will. But put your best foot forward, or I fear
That we shall miss the mail: and here it comes With five at top: as quaint a four-in-hand
- three pyebalds and a roan.
ALTHOUGH I be the basest of mankind, From scalp to sole one slough and crust of sin, Unfit for earth, unfit for heaven, scarce meet For troops of devils, mad with blasphemy,
I will not cease to grasp the hope I hold
Of saintdom, and to clamor, mourn and sob,
Battering the gates of heaven with storms of prayer,
Have mercy, Lord, and take away my
Let this avail, just, dreadful, mighty God, This not be all in vain, that thrice ten years, Thrice multiplied by superhuman pangs,
In hungers and in thirsts, fevers and cold,
In coughs, aches, stitches, ulcerous throes and cramps,
A sign betwixt the meadow and the cloud,
Patient on this tall pillar I have borne
Rain, wind, frost, heat, hail, damp, and sleet, and snow;
And I had hoped that ere this period closed
Thou wouldst have caught me up into thy rest,
Denying not these weather-beaten limbs
The meed of saints, the white robe and the palm.
O take the meaning, Lord: I do not breathe,
Not whisper, any murmur of complaint.
Pain heaped ten-hundred-fold to this, were still Less burthen, by ten-hundred-fold, to bear,
Than were those lead-like tons of sin, that crushed My spirit flat before thee.
Thou knowest I bore this better at the first, For I was strong and hale of body then;
And though my teeth, which now are dropt away, Would chatter with the cold, and all my beard Was tagged with icy fringes in the moon,
I drowned the whoopings of the owl with sound Of pious hymns and psalms, and sometimes saw An angel stand and watch me, as I sang.
Now am I feeble grown: my end draws nigh- I hope my end draws nigh: half deaf I am, So that I scarce can hear the people hum About the column's base, and almost blind, And scarce can recognize the fields I know. And both my thighs are rotted with the dew, Yet cease I not to clamor and to cry, While my stiff spine can hold my weary head, Till all my limbs drop piecemeal from the stone, Have mercy, mercy: take away my sin!
O Jesus, if thou wilt not save my soul, Who may be saved? who is it may be saved?
Who may be made a saint, if I fail here? Show me the man hath suffered more than I. For did not all thy martyrs die one death? For either they were stoned, or crucified, Or burned in fire, or boiled in oil, or sawn In twain beneath the ribs; but I die here To-day, and whole years long, a life of death. Bear witness, if I could have found a way (And heedfully I sifted all my thought) More slowly-painful to subdue this home Of sin, my flesh, which I despise and hate, I had not stinted practice, oh my God!
For not alone this pillar-punishment,
Not this alone I bore: but while I lived In the white convent down the valley there, For many weeks about my loins I wore
The rope that haled the buckets from the well, Twisted as tight as I could knot the noose; And spake not of it to a single soul, Until the ulcer, eating through my skin, Betrayed my secret penance, so that all My brethren marvelled greatly. More than this I bore, whereof, oh God, thou knowest all.
Three winters, that my soul might grow to thee, I lived up there on yonder mountain side. My right leg chained into the crag, I lay
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